5 ways you can help someone with grief this festive season

By Cancer Council NSW 22 Dec 2023

The festive season, often marked by joy and celebration, can be a challenging time for those going through grief.

Whether someone is grieving a loved one who has died recently or experiencing a resurgence of emotions tied to special occasions, understanding how to support them is crucial.

Let’s explore five ways to provide meaningful support.

1. Listen rather than talk

During the festive season, grief can often intensify, which is why it’s so important to be a compassionate listener.

Understand that individuals may not be ready to talk about their feelings immediately. Instead of pushing for conversation, offer your presence and let them be the guide.

Grief is an experience that’s unique for each person, and offering a non-judgmental space for expression is an important aspect of support.

2. Let them know you’re thinking of them

Show your support by acknowledging significant dates, such as birthdays, anniversaries and holidays.

A heartfelt card, a thoughtful letter, or a small gift like flowers or a plant can show that you care.

Checking in on them regularly and consistent, gentle reminders that they are not alone in their grief can provide meaningful comfort during the festive season and beyond.

Ask if it’s okay to talk about the person who died. It may seem daunting, but it can be a therapeutic way to remember and celebrate their life.

Friends and family members may use different names for the person who died – ask what name they would like you to use.

Sharing memories, anecdotes and stories can be a beautiful way to honour the person and provide a sense of continuity amid the loss.

4. Give them a hand with the small stuff

Grief can make daily tasks overwhelming. Extend your support by helping with the everyday things, like grocery shopping, laundry, gardening, childcare, bill payments, cooking or transportation.

These tangible acts of kindness can help ease the burden on someone grieving, allowing them the time and space to process their emotions without the added stress of daily responsibilities.

5. Stick around

It’s important to continue your support even after the person seems to be coping better. Grief has no set timeline and may resurface during unexpected moments.

Continuing your support for months or years can be invaluable, as people often need to grapple with the lasting impact of their grief.

Read more about grief when someone has died from cancer in Cancer Council’s Understanding Grief resource.

Cancer Council may be able to offer support after someone has died from cancer. Call us on 13 11 20 to speak to one of our experienced health professionals.